The Un-Bride


Well, we’re still engaged. 

To answer your incessant questions:

  1. No, we don’t know when we’re getting married.
  2. No, we don’t know where we’re getting married.
  3. No, I don’t know what my colors are?

In all fairness the last question was posed by an Internet questionnaire. Not just one mind you, several. A 5 page questionnaire seems to be standard procedure when booking appointments in bridal stores. Another question: “Do you enjoy one-on-one consultation?” No. I don't. Regardless, I’ve made some appointments to try on dresses. I am planning to milk the crap out of the experience. Those poor consultants.

I don't have the answer to any of the below questions - and I certainly don't want to find an amazing dress. These people don't know me at all. In fact, it's proof positive that wedding crap in general is geared entirely toward . . . not me. 

This is going to be a nightmare and that is why I’m going to try and enjoy every second of it. "I’ll try on the blush ball-gowns please. All of them." Plus, I will be armed to the teeth with two of my BFF’s.  They have opposing opinions and I always have the opposite opinion to theirs. Wish us luck!


Join me next time and hear me say: "This dress is suffocating my knees!"